I’m probably about to get really attacked but honestly divorce could be something we hear less and less about if the way people date changes. There should not be pressure to get engaged after just a few meetings. There should be opportunity for the couple to get to know each other in a more natural way without a shadchan in between being the communication. It isn’t fair to put all this pressure on young people who still haven’t fully matured to recognize the struggles of marriage. So many of them are just obsessing about the idea of marriage, vs. what it actually means. I know many many girls who just envy the next girl who gets engaged because it has become a “phenomenon”, and boys are so “scarce and limited” that girls will just take the first guy they get because they think no one else will come around for them. Who is putting these ideas into their head? Since when does this refelct our emunah in Hashem? This is a man made problem that must be fixed.
People don’t realize that marriage doesn’t solve problems, it takes on someone else problems. And learning to work these kinds of things out before they even get ENGAGED (yes shock, they should date for longer/ talk more outside of their 4 hour dates) they would have just a little bit more knowledge into how marriage to this person will be.
Maybe rabbis don’t trust these couples to stay shomer, but frankly, they will have to be shomer for half their lives anyways. And if we can’t trust them with this, then how can we trust them to go into a marriage and have children which both of these need a lot of maturity and responsibility.
Please don’t attack me…this is just a thought.