“I think that the general daas of husbands davening kabalas Shabbos early is not to be mikabel Shabbos for their wife so the wife can light as late as she wants (up to shkia)”
It is a Machlokes HaPoskim. Rav Moshe Feinstein (& I think the Debreciner Rav) holds that when a husband is mekabel Shabbos early, it doesn’t affect the wife and the wife can do melacha and licht right up to 18 minutes before Shkia (NOT at SHKIA).
Other contemporary poskim hold that when a husband says Barchu, the wife (& other family members) is nigrar and ‘shlepped’ to start shabbos at that time.