OurTORAH: Yekke2 has pretty much said what I was planning to, plus a significant amount more.
And I particularly agree with the distinction he made between judging and justifying. As you kindly acknowledged, I was careful above to be none-judgemental. But not judging does not mean justifying behaviour one does not agree with.
Another important distinction was also made several times in the above discussion to what extent ‘Chareidim’ keep not just pure halacha, but ‘chumra’, and that practices one would consider problematic from a ‘Chareidi’ viewpoint is actually not as contrary to halacha as one might seem. But to label all areas where MO differ from ‘typical orthodox’ as ‘chumros’ would be no more true than labelling them all unforgiveable aveiros. A fair number of the issues cited above are certainly not ‘chumros’.
And, OurTORAH, reading your admirably worded and touching post, I again feel the need to reiterate that this is not a matter of judging. I fully accept your point about your family loving Torah, and loving yiddishkeit. And I also understand that much of what is written here could be hurtful, and I hope nobody is upset by this. But accepting people, their love of yiddishkeit and their individual mesiras nefesh and devotion to Torah, does not translate into accepting an entire movement who’s central ethos may contain aspects that some might consider very problematic. Perhaps my perception is misguided, and actually there is no matter of concern there. But, based on past experience and my limited knowledge, and I am genuinely sorry to say this, there are issues with the general movement. And whilst this shouldn’t be the central message of this thread, which should be about accepting people and finding common ground, it is an unfortunate reality.