yekke- thank you for your post! i truly admire your point of view, and the clarity that you see in your yiddishkeit. I appreciate your post. If you are interested, please continue reading my response to the other poster, as it pertains to some of the things you touched upon.
neutriquam- thank you as well. I understand your position, however my point wasn’t to say that you should accept what they do as truth. Maybe what they are doing isn’t right or isnt what your rabbi told you, or how you were raised. It is literally about simply accepting them. If we all accepted the fact that every person serves hashem in their own way, which doesnt mean bend my standards, it means I will stil be me, but I will choose to love that person simply because they r a jew. I will show my children that we could still be sthe way we are, and its beauitufl, but I am going to expose my children to other types of people, to make my children less judgemental and more loving of others. And when they ask “Why don’t we do what they do?”, you are there to answer their questions. Children get healthy and emesdik answers this way. Versus being sheltered and not knowing, then finding out from other sources and sometimes going off your derech. I am not saying that you should bend yourself to accomodate others. On the contrary, embrace the for who they are despite being so different from you, and love them because Hashem created them as a fellow Jew.
I am going to end with a story. I worked with a family who had a sick child and they arent religious. I went into their home every week in my tznious clothes, bringing them kosher food to the hospital and never imposing myself on them. Not once did I think “Hey, these people are so wrong. They go out to non-kosher restuarant, they dont keep shabbos etc. On the contrary, I came, loved and embraced them for who they were and over time started having an impact on them without even imposing myself. They started asking questions about shabbos, about friday night, about holidays. I sent them to speak to rabbis. They started to keep friday night dinners. I never looked at their short comings. I always focused on what they were doing, cuz exactly like yekke said, their tafkid isnt nessicairly to be frum.