PBA, I know that was your purpose, but I do think that no one can possibly judge how another person feels/experiences even things that the person himself has “experienced”. Two people are sick with the same virus, but each person experiences it differently, based on their personality as well as their physical makeup and strength. They can’t even compare notes since it’s like two different viruses. That’s what I mean “don’t judge a person until you stand in his shoes” – meaning to mean to experience a situation as if he were experiencing it because you are standing in his place. It’s totally not possible, even if you could, but since men can’t have babies, then we’re just talking circles.
By the way, I wasn’t the one who suggested you try having babies, cinderella was, but I didn’t take offense.
And yes, I do think that there are people, actually of both sexes, who will milk any situation for what it’s worth, and a pregnant woman will certainly raise her husband’s sympathies in untold ways since 1. he “caused” her situation, 2. it is “his” baby she is carrying, 3. he can’t do it instead, and probably most importantly, 4. GUILT.
I actually loved being pregnant and wish I could do it again, but I’d be afraid to at my age. That’s not to say that I didn’t complain when things bothered me. Yes, I had some nausea. Yes, the last few weeks were very tiring and difficult, but considering that all of my babies were big (I had a 10 lb. 14 oz. baby that I delivered without an operation) that’s not so surprising. Yes, I was happy to finally deliver them healthily into this world. But even with all of the aches and pains of bearing and birthing my children, I think the experience of being pregnant and the feeling of closeness to Hashem that it gave me while he created my baby inside of me was the most amazing experience and I would wish it on anybody who could safely do it.