Joseph, you’re evading the question. Please explain what exactly those “requisite halachic stipulations” would be.
nishtdayngesheft: Most of the chessed that they do (not all, but most) is true chessed. They call it tikkun olam, which my husband finds hilarious because apparently that’s not at all what tikkun olam actually means in the Gemara. I agree with you about Avi Weiss: yes, he is “a problem,” and yes, he does chessed just about as well as Reform rabbis do (I don’t know about more, but about the same). I have to disagree about his talmidim, though; I know many of them, and they aren’t “actively seeking to harm frum Yidden”. To the contrary, they bring warmth and sincerity and Torah to MO communities. I have a great deal more respect for them than I do for him, in fact. Yes, most frum rabbis have some sort of chessed operations in place, but they aren’t public about it. Reform communities really integrate chessed into their ongoing activities and get the entire congregation involved. It’s a model we can certainly learn from.
Sparkly: It depends what you mean by “anti the Reform movement”. I wish that it didn’t exist and I wish that all Jews in the world would return to frumkeit. BUT, since I don’t live in a world where that’s true (yet), since Moshiach hasn’t come and the majority of Jews are NOT frum, I have to live with that reality. And I just don’t see how pushing away the not frum population is helpful or productive in any way. I see no reason to criticize their beliefs. I already know that I don’t agree with them. I already know that I believe their interpretations of Torah to be wrongheaded. I already know that I believe that the way they practice Judaism leads to assimilation, and to people who are not halachically Jewish growing up in Jewish communities. Those are all problems that I have with the movement and its leadership. But let me be clear: I have zero problems with the PEOPLE who identify as Reform. They are lovely people, sincere people, people who are part of Klal Yisroel just like you and I are, people who will be judged by Hashem eventually and need no judgment from you or I in the meantime. And, yes, I also believe that I can learn something from these people, because I can learn something from everyone. I treat them warmly, with respect and dignity. I invite them into my home, I listen to their Torah, I don’t attend their services or eat in their houses, but neither do I make fun of them behind their back. I count many of them as friends, and I refrain from discussing my beliefs with them unless they ask me, in which case I am happy to have the conversation. But I will not actively push Orthodoxy on them, just as I would never want them to push their beliefs on me.
I believe that every frum person should make an effort to treat non frum people with compassion, for two reasons. First of all, because that is what will bring the Geulah, and second of all, because derech eretz is derech eretz no matter who you are.