Sparkly – I didn’t say that at all – please reread what I wrote. I am not judging people – it is impossible to talk about who is worse (or better) since there are so many factors that only Hashem knows. That is why Hashem is the only One who can judge anyone. I pointed out that the Tinok Shenishba may not be punished since it’s not his fault. For that matter, I wouldn’t be so quick to blame the OTD person. It might also not be his fault and he might be a type of tinok shenishba if he was taught things in an incorrect fashion. For that matter, the conservative person might not be a tinok shenishba.
The point here is not to judge any person – I was talking about which actions/ideologies are worse, not about the people. You have to distinguish between people and their actions (like, Im Yirtzeh Hashem, when you have kids, don’t tell your kid that he is bad; tell him that his behavior is bad).
Rav Moshe Feinstein specifically points out that even if the Conservative person is a Tinok Shenishba, he is still an apikorus. No one is blaming him – it’s not his fault- but l’maaseh he is still an apikorus.