Truebt, your post is beautiful, but Sparkly is not a bt. You probably have not read all her posts in previous threads, or you would realize that the context of her posts is not what you are making it out to be, and that there is a reason why people are responding the way that they are. When people become Frum, they are told to take it slowly, since it is not a good idea to take everything on at once. Even if someone is already Frum, they are also told to work on themselves step by step.
However, that is not exactly the issue at hand.
The problem is that in the world of “already Frum” people, there is unfortunately a certain attitude in a large segment of the Orthodox world. This attitude is that being Frum only includes Shabbos and Kashrus and a few other things such as fasting on Yom Kippur and Tisha B’Av, but certain things such as tznius and shmiras hayain and being shomer negiah are not “included” in being Frum, and they are kind of viewed as extras. They are for people who are “ultra Orthodox”, and as long as you call yourself Modern Orthodox, you are not obligated in those Mitzvos.
Of course, we are all unfinished products, and we are all working on ourselves, and some people find certain things more challenging than others do. The fact that someone has certain challenges does not mean that he should consider himself OTD, and he should be praised for keeping those things that he is able to.
However, there is a very fine line between saying that a certain Mitzvah is challenging for you and between legitimizing its non-observance. When someone (with the possible exception of a new bt) makes a statement that being Frum means keeping Shabbos and Kashrus, he is advocating that viewpoint, albeit inadvertantly.
Sparkly is in a situation in which it is important for her to feel good about those things that she does keep (and it is even possible that she keeps everything) and to feel that she is still an Eved Hashem and part of the Orthodox community even if she can’t live up to all the things that she was once taught that everyone has to do and even if she feels she needs to be part of a community where many do not keep everything.
She is absolutely right for feeling that way, and I think it is great that she found a community in which she feels comfortable and can continue being an Eved Hashem.
However, she has a hard time differentiating between the two attitudes and understanding that it is possible to be tolerant and accepting of someone without validating their actions. So she ends up making statements that inadvertently espouse the viewpoint that one does not HAVE TO keep certain Mitzvos and it is being extra-Frum if one does, as well as the view that calling oneself Modern Orthodox makes it okay to do things that would not be okay were one to call oneself Yeshivish. Hence, all the comments in response to her comments.