Reply To: Going off the Derech

Zahavasdad- I agree with you. I’ve alreaady accepted that he won’t go to Yeshiva gedola, and tried to get him to see that hanging out with this crowd is not going to give him a good future. These kids are basically street boys, and that’s what my son says he wants to be! Like BTGuy said, I try to be the voice of reason, asking him, “where do you want to be in 2 years? 5 years?”. His answer is, hanging out with his ‘friends’. ProudtobeaYid says it’s an immature age, and it’s true, bc he can’t see beyond today. Apparently, he’s been living a double life the past few years, reluctantly going to Yeshiva, praying etc, while escaping into secular music and videos. Now he feels connected to the secular world, and this ‘chevra’ reinforces that feeling. I wouldn’t complain if he ends up with a good job with a kipa on his head, but he’s already changed, in terms of his ‘walk’, his language, attitude etc, that it doesn’t look like that’s where he’s going.

I hope you’re right, ProudtobeaYid, but it just seems like a ‘compliment here and there’ will carry any weight in comparison to the pull of those street boys.

Thank-you A Mamin for your nice words.

Imaofthree-Thank-you for your advice. How did you cope with your daughter going otd?