Reply To: Going off the Derech

apushatayid/zahavasdad – College or working are both acceptable options for me, but I guess my son is stuck, or unable to take the step for some reason. How should I force him to go to school or get a job? I gave him exactly those 3 options, Yeshiva, school/college or work? But if he doesn’t pick one of them, should I throw him out of the house?

As it stands now, he has agreed to finish this year if I give him my computer (without internet) to use when he comes home. Only problem is: his heart is not in the learning, he’s watching secular videos, and I feel completely helpless bc he’s calling all the shots. Also, he’s still with the chevra on Shabbos and in between computer time.

msseeker-in theory, I agree with you. But it’s very hard to follow through on it, especially bc he has agreed to finish Yeshiva this year, which was a big thing. Even though I don’t know what that really means exactly, bc he hasn’t really chosen a direction. We’re just buying time and putting off the inevitable confrontation for next year. You’re right, I am concernced for my other kids, and from your words, I will try to pay more attention to them and their perspective of things.