Reply To: Going off the Derech

Hmom-you said, she told you that you don’t understand her, so ask her, what does she get by going out with goyim that a Jewish boy can’t give her? Try to understand what she’s looking for. Did you try reality testing her choice, ie, how would she feel marrying a goy who wants his kids baptized? Or if her kids decided to have no connection to judaism? Does she have a limit, or a line that she wouldn’t cross, ie going to church? Does she feel any connection to yiddishkeit? I knew someone a while back, who was very secular, but Jewish. One day, she came crying to me that her daughter wants to marry a goy. I asked her why she was so surprised, when her daughter never grew up with the feeling of what it means to be Jewish? Her chinuch was to teach her kids that they should be ‘good’ people, and they should marry a ‘good’ person, well this goy was the ‘good’ person her daughter found. That was this woman’s limit, she may have wanted to live a secular life, but she didn’t want her daughter to marry a goy. Your daughter may be thinking it’s not a big deal, but perhaps, gently suggest that she think things through, way past the ‘now’, into her future. She may think it’s okay to go out with goyim, but what if her kids want to go to church, would that be okay?

I think you should consider sending her to Israel..