Reply To: Going off the Derech

aries2756-I tried saying hello, but my son looked embarrased.

With a heavy heart I write this, as things seem to spiral downward, even as we approach the new year. I can’t feel any simcha or hope that things will get better. After swallowing my pride many times over, giving when I felt like turning away, forcing a smile when my heart was breaking, my son continues to hate us. We have become the enemy. He stayed out all of Friday night and came home Saturday evening, never telling us that he was leaving, and when he was coming back. We were up almost all night, waiting. He didn’t take a key. When I asked where he slept, he wouldn’t say. He’s now smoking on Shabbos publicly, and being mechalel Shabbos even more, watching movies etc. When he finally came home to shower, he only screamed at me for asking where he slept. I wanted to give him a letter, telling him how much we love him and wishing him a Happy New Year, but he was so full of hate and threats, that I couldn’t get myself to give it to him. He left saying he doesn’t know when he’s coming back. I don’t know where all his anger comes from. Every time he comes home after spending a lot of time with his chevra, he’s full of anger. Friday night, he came to the seuda, and it was pleasant. But he left so quickly! I guess, I don’t know how to get past my own sadness. And he doesn’t even give us a tiny opening so that we can reach out to him. I’m losing hope…

I wish all of you a Happy New Year, may all of your children see the beauty of yiddishkeit and come back to the derech, and may those who lost their way, reach out to Hashem during this auspicious time, and find their way back. May you all have nachas from all your children.

Shana Tovah….