Im guessing it was to a jewish kallah?!?! A jewish discussion board heh, wouldnt happen to be a little place I know called the YWN CR, would it?
Be thankfull she is jewish and frum at least and hope that its from Shamayim, you cant dictate your friend’s life, maybe explain to your older kids that it wasnt the norm but everyone can make their own choices in life, even if you dont agree