Little Froggie – Please for give me if I come across as criticizing you. it has been 30-40 years since I was in Bais Medrash and learning the laws of loshon horah. Now a days I learn the Daf and work and go to a gemarah shuir at night.
The conditions for permissible Lashon Hara (bein adam lamakom)
1)Firsthand knowledge Does this mean you actually saw or heard it, or is hearsay included.
2)Examine if it’s really wrong Does this mean you analyze the case and review the laws to insure that a sin has been committed.
3)Not to talk out of hatred This is intent which I think you wrote Point #3 is wrong, as you wrote, as stated openly in the Chofetz Chaim. It should also be noted that there shouldn’t be intent to embarrass or make fun of the person you are talking about.
4)Not to exaggerate the son Is this only regarding son but it’s okay to exaggerate about daughters? In my opinion an exaggeration that is sociable acceptable such as he is one of the best boys in the yeshiva is okay while he knows the whole perek of gemorah when he doesn’t isn’t.
5)Not to speak secretly I don’t understand. You are suppose to publicize it, that is tattletaling which is also prohibited.
Please Note I am not trying to criticize anyone but merely to learn the laws and the comments are solely my opinion and should not be viewed as Halochah Lemisah, as legal according to Jewish law.