DY: ” ‘He said that the boy was dating not in order to get married.’
You’re making it sound worse than it is. He said the boy has commitment issues, not that he is stringing people along intentionally.”
These were his words:
“The guy has commitment issues. He just wants to date not marry.”
One of my main objections was the fact that he said that he was dating not to get married. He could have just stated that he has commitment issues. Based on what we were told, commitment issues was one possibility. But commitment issues does not necessarily mean that someone is dating not to get married, and there was absolutely no reason to assume such a thing.
“There’s no way Abba_s could know the real reason. It was obviously, even if worded wrongly, merely speculation.”
One of the other issues was the fact that he said it as a fact, NOT as a speculation. As I stated previously, he could have (and should have said) “Perhaps…”
“Ordinarily, motzi shem ra is saying something negative and false as fact.”
Which is what he did.
“Do you have a source saying that speculation falls under the issur?”
I think it’s pretty obvious that if you to someone, “Maybe Sara is stupid”, that would be a problem.