Reply To: Dating with a divorced guy – when should I ask about his divorce?

Home Forums Shidduchim Dating with a divorced guy – when should I ask about his divorce? Reply To: Dating with a divorced guy – when should I ask about his divorce?

#1197025
Abba_S
Participant

“When I check out divorced guys, I usually try to ask if he pays child support. You don’t want to marry a guy who doesn’t pay child support!”

Here in New York, HRA the Social Service Agency will collect child support for a nominal fee, if you are not on a government program, otherwise it’s free, hunting them down and collecting the child support. I think most states have similar programs, it gets a lot of people off government programs and saves the taxpayers millions of dollars a year. It’s usually garnished off the payroll check so not paying child support is not an option unless they are paid in cash (off the books). So unless the dead beat dad lives and work outside of the US he will be paying child support. Likewise, he can’t avoid child support payment just because he wasn’t granted visitation rights that he was entitled to.

Lavender – You need to see how your boyfriend interact with his children and their mother. This will show his true feelings rather then try to find out who was at fault. You need to meet the children in order to know if they will accept you or consider you to be the evil stepmother. You will also need to have a good relationship with the ex wife as she can make your boyfriend’s life and if you marry him you life as well, a living hell, as long as she has custody of his kids.

I don’t mean to scare you away from this relationship, I just am telling you things you should be aware of before committing to this relationship. May you find your true love and build a true house in Israel.