I believe Lavender lives in Israel. I don’t know what the laws are here. I would imagine that there are always ways to get around it though. I know men in the US who didn’t pay child support, but that was years ago, and maybe things were different then.
The old days of getting away with being a Deadbeat Dad-Mom are gone at least in New York State. Their licenses are suspended and the state is coming after them and collecting child support. Miss one payment and they will garnish all future payments from your paycheck. Getting a job outside of the state doesn’t help because your employer must check your social security number to verify you are legal, informing the IRS who inform the state who then garnish the child support from your paycheck. Being caught driving with a suspended license will result in them being arrested and requiring someone to come down and drive their car from the police station.
I don’t know where the OP is currently living nor do I know the ages of the children. I believe Israel has similar laws and what is happening is they flee the country, sometimes coming to the US. In Israel the ex has to hire a lawyer or use Legal Aid to collect which isn’t as effective.
Why is it needed to discus the divorce. It’s highly unlikely she will ever find out the truth, the husband will blame the wife and the ex will blame her husband. I already said that on the fourth date she should ask about the children and while discussing the children the divorce might come up. If she doesn’t ask to meet then children on the fourth date then when? Remember he probably doesn’t have custody so it may not be easy to arrange the meeting with the children.