Lenny the reason I told you to go to the Rabbi from Bais HoRa is that both you and your wife have experience with him and he is a good mediator as he got your wife to go to counseling. The $50,000-$75,000 is a one time payment for the Kesobah (marriage contract).Splitting assets 50-50 is how the Civil Court does it. But if you both agree on financial matters, custody and child support as long as it’s reasonable the Civil Court Judge will sign off on it.
Your wife needs your consent for the Get. You need her consent in the custody and financial matters. If an agreement is made, you need to authorize a Get, which is to be put in escrow until after a civil court divorce is approved according to the term agreed. Give the get before the civil divorce is finalized and your wife can ask the judge for a 50-50 split alimony and child support at higher levels then agreed upon.