I haven’t read through the entire thread, so if this one’s here, please forgive me.
Two middle-aged men, Shmuel and Aaron, are learning together in the Beis Midrash. When they come to a break, Shmuel says:
“You know, my daughter is getting married next month. We’ve been learning together for years, and so I’d like to honor you with being one of the witnesses at the ceremony.”
At this, Aaron looks a little embarrased and says: “I’m sorry to do this to you, Shumuel, but, well, I’m afraid I have to turn you down. You see, well, I’m actually not Jewish can can’t serve as a witness.”
“What do you mean you’re not Jewish?” asks Shmuel. “We’ve been learning together for years. How can it be that you’re not Jewish?”
“Well,” answers Aaron, “I’ve always found the learning to be a great intellectual exercise. And, of course, I also like spending time with you. But, in the end, I’m still not Jewish.”
“But hold on,” Shumuel protested. “I’ve seen you keep Shabbos. You know that a non-Jew isn’t allowed to keep Shabbos.”
“Ah,” replied Aaron serenly, “you only *thought* you saw me keep Shabbos. The truth of the matter is that I always kept a key in my pocket when I walked outside. This way I always carried on Shabbos.”
“But there’s an eruv!” said Shmuel.
“Yes,” countered Aaron, “but I don’t hold of the eruv.”
The Wolf