That must be really hard for you. I truly sympathize with you on this. Although you’ve mentioned alot of detail I don’t know the full story well enough to advise but I really wish you pure hatzlocha and Brocha in finding your true zivug in life. May you merit to build a bayis Ne’eman beyisroel very soon. I feel your pain it’s definitely not easy. May we only hear of simcha bekorov. Daven hard!!! Break through those gates and you’ll find her. TRUST in the one above!!! He has got his Devine plans for each and every one of his creations. Hope all goes well.
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