Wolf, if it helps you to be happier and to be a better Jew, and to give your kids an appreciation for Yiddishkeit and Jewish holidays,I think it’s a Mitzvah.
In any case, as long as you have hodayah at your Chanuka party, it’s fine. Sing Al Hanisim with feeling, thank your wife (according to Rav Avigdor Miller, if you don’t thank your mother/wife, your thanks to Hashem is meaningless) or she can thank you if you’re the one who made everything, enabling both of you to reach higher levels of hodaya to HaKadosh Baruch Hu.