LB – When you say that you said “berachot” for family members, what exactly do you mean by that? Were you saying the bracha on the candles more than once? If you were, that could explain why the Kiruv Rebbetzin got upset, since that would definitely be a problem.
Otherwise, it’s hard for me to see why it’s a problem to light more than 2. There are many minhagim when it comes to lighting candles. I’ll try to look it up when I have a chance, but I think there is a minhag to light 7 candles, for example, and maybe 10 as well.