“…wouldn’t the roshei yeshiva and rabbonim, who I am sure know what goes on and are involved in their talmidim’s and children’s dating, say something and put a stop to it? If they haven’t, then maybe they feel it is necessary?”
Maybe they have an idea but look the other way because they have bigger battles and it’s better to tolerate it than risk pushing people away from Yiddishkeit.
They may be in a tough predicament. If they prevent young people, hormones and all, from dating as they currently do, then their talmidim may grow resentful.
And/or, imposing rules on bochurim may also close the channel of communication between them and the talmidim, which may also be detrimental for them in the long run.
Maybe that’s also why teaching women tznius is so critical. More so than ever, they may have to be the direct voice of opposition.
Though surely I cannot generalize about rosh yeshivot and rabbonim.
I wonder if it’s like how people go to doctor’s today when they’re sick and the doctor prescribes antibiotics out of pressure. If he/she doesn’t prescribe then maybe the patient may be unsatisfied and find another doctor who complies.