Lenny1970, you said ” Instead of ruling on the Get, which I refused to go along with, the Beis Din ruled along the lines of they were going to seize nearly all my assets; force me to move out of our marital home and have me pay my wife hefty alimony while the divorce was ongoing.” (Lenny1970)
From what I’ve learned, the husband’s neshama in these cases wants to give his wife the Get. Sometimes the husband’s body/mind get in the way. So the rabbis find a way to nudge his body/mind to the side so that the husband really acts on his neshama.
In other words, why wouldn’t the Beis Din care about the Get? You flat out refused and have been resistant from the get-go. More than anything, it sounds like they are trying to help you give the Get on your own accord. It’s up to you whether you will become penniless in the process.
At some point, why not do this for your own sake at least? You don’t have to fight a war at home. Baruch Hashem, Hashem gave you this time to live as a civilian. Honor it. Honor yourself. Why not bring honor to this struggle by offering what your neshama wants?