Lenny- I don’t know what to make of your story. You seem to be a very interesting person. The following types of person come to mind:
1. An authentic genuine person who is lacking certain social skills;
2. A troll without a specific goal; or
3. A dangerous troll trying to use this forum as a tool for your goals.
I hope you are one, yet my instincts tell me you are 3. Regardless of what you are, you likely need professional advice regarding significant medical moral and psychological issues.
This may seem harsh, but I call them as I see them. Prove me wrong and I’ll retract.