I don’t know if the topic at hand is older singles or younger singles, and perhaps the two should be evaluated separately. But when you are dealing with older singles, I think that a big part of the issue is that dating is very difficult. It is extremely draining physically and emotionally and it is very time-consuming and money – consuming (for girls as well as boys since they may have to spend a lot of money as well as time before the date in preparation).
I have never understood people who say, “just give it one date; what’s the big deal?” Dating is a VERY BIG deal!!! At least if you are the type who takes each date seriously, which is the way that one should date, imho.
And if you are an “older single”, chances are that you have already gone on at least 100 dates, and in some cases. over 500 dates. And you might not feel capable of going out on another 100-500 dates.
That is why many people feel that they can’t just go out with anyone unless the person really sounds like someone they want to go out with. I think that is very reasonable. That is also why I think that it might be a good idea to have another method by which singles can meet each other.
There definitely can be chesronos to other methods so they should not be used instead of the shidduch system, but only in addition to the shidduch system for those people who have already given the shidduch system a fair shot.