Syag
“I don’t know if this is clear.”
Completely!
We are coming from slightly different places as you “don’t enjoy controversy or arguments (I would never make it in the bais medrash)” and That is precisely what draws me here, as I miss the bais medrash. But I completely get what you are saying
And I agree putting down a poster who seemed to be looking for “chizuk and empathy on such a personal topic” is not the time for argument and put downs.
Unfortunately though it is to be expected, so if that can be ignored (easier said than done) their may be some empathy/chizuk that can be provided
edited (for some of the reasons mentioned above)