golfer – many people speak out very strongly against those who have that permissive attitude but I feel like you left out the middle route. Shopping is harping more on schools making rules and parents disrespecting them and the authority figures who enforce them.
The problem that I think is being referred to here is that schools can have rules, and parents need to support them, and kids can handle that, but when schools make rules and are: 1) not clear about defining what is Halacha and what is a school rule, 2) clear but wrong in labeling non halachos as halachos, (perhaps hoping for compliance?) 3) using humiliation to enforce rules.
I have mentioned before that I know a boy who was sent home DURING DAVENING (from a dorm, one hour walk from his home) for wearing socks that are not halachically problematic but are a problem at that school. Is the yeshiva allowed to have such rules? of course. Will that rule make a kid go OTD? of course not. Will throwing a kid out of the bais medrash during davening, in front of everyone, sending him on a one hour walk that with no doubt meant missing mussaf send a kid OTD? Whatever your answer, I believe you understand the point being made.
Kids can deal with a rogue staff member but depending how many, how often, and how humiliating (besides how inappropriate…) may answer that question.