akuperma:
You wrote: “As long as it doesnโt violate halacha, Jewish school can make rules (even arbitrary and capricious ones) , just like all other private schools โ even if such rules are not required by halacha.”
I take strong issue with this. I know I will be drowned out, but I am fully aware that it is Elul, and I cannot accept concepts that are blatantly wrong. My conscience is perfectly clear.
As a private school, these yeshivos and schools certainly CAN make any rules they wish. Unless, of course, the rules themselves violate halacha. But SHOULD they? I believe that these rules that are arbitrary, contribute zero to ruchniyus, do not make talmidim/os feel welcome, appreciated, and do not otherwise benefit the talmidim are destructive. They prove to the world, and to the neshamos the schools are supposed to value, that the image of the yeshiva and its administration reign supreme. Rules that do not benefit the student body are not just useless, but are potentially destructive.
In too many cases, rules are there to boast to other mosdos that this one is better, holier, and more machmir. In too many cases, these rules serve to exclude some, punish others, and embarrass a whole lot more. And in my book, exclusion, punishment, and shame are severely negative factors in chinuch (I include parents in this, not just yeshivos).
I noted this many times before in other threads, but we are presently gifted to have a substantial selection of seforim from Gedolei Yisroel or our generation and few previous ones onthe subject of chinuch. These are precious reservoirs of Torah guidance on how to be mechanech (again both parents and yeshivos). Their knowledge and wisdom is Torah derived, so no one has a complaint that these are modern or secular. NONE of them accept the types of exclusion, punishment, or shaming that are commonplace in today’s yeshivos and schools. We are busy questioning whether today’s yeshivos can make rules. Yes, they can. They can require all pens be blue ink or black ink. They can require pencils to have erasers or not. They can require yarmulkas to be certain colors, sizes, and number of sections. They are not public servants, but purveyors of private enterprises. They are not ืขืืกืงืื ืืฆืจืื ืฆืืืืจ. The special ืฉืืจ granted to ืขืืกืงืื ืืฆืจืื ืฆืืืืจ does not apply to them. So they CAN make such rules. But if we examine whether these rules are of benefit to the mission that one would expect them to have, as providing an opportunity to the younger generation to be connected to the mesora of Torah from Har Sinai, they fail completely. And it is a real shame, because they can choose to be that conduit. They can choose to be a public service, but they opt out of that.
I am not addressing any individual yeshiva or school. I speak to the trend that has gripped them all, not different from the addictions that affect so many. To justify that which is destructive is what the drug addict does when he/she risks death or injury with each high.
For those who would attack me that I am being motzi shem rah, I assure you that I have no such intention. I beg that we recognize the great potential that every yeshiva has, as a prime source of ืขืืืื ืืืืืืง to every single neshomoh, to help each child learn to enjoy Torah and Mitzvos, and grow in Ahavas Hashem and Yir’as Hashem. To divert the energy to these small matters strips the potential of the yeshiva from accomplishing the mission for which it is needed.