Joseph
Re: shadchan
So all our grandparents or greatgrandparents who met their spouses in the camps after the war were “problematic “ ? (Many just met. Or knew each other from before the war/camps. No shadchan)
Re: Yaakov avinu
In this context, you seem to be implying that yaakov did something wrong.
Re: bar or coed dance
That’s ridiculous logic. Just because some may have met in an inappropriate place such as an inappropriate bar or dance, does not mean that all such marriages were the result of an inappropriate meeting.