Ok listen. Here some advice.
1) Shadchanim EVERYWHERE are overwhelmed. I went to a “good shachan” 2 months ago who has yet to even give me a single name of a person. Sometimes I think she might of forgotten about my existence. It’s all from Hashem, you have to do your hishtadlus and go to a few shachanim. Whoever isn’t interested, drop them. Find someone else. Don’t go to too many and remember 90 percent of shidduchim are redt by family and friends.
2) Everyone has “red strikes” against them. You say most of your friends and family are OTD, well I made aliyah in my teens, got kicked out mid-school, and I’m also overweight. I have strikes against me too. But if you dwell on that, it will end of defining you. As much as what you are trying to do is the opposite, it sounds like you are trying to make sure everyone else sees who you are, but from the tone of your posts it seems like you might have to work on your attitude a little. Everyone had marks, but it’s all in Hashem’s hands.