@slominer
If there was a sheva mitzvos bnei noach event, shelo asani goy would be an insensitive and definitely offensive song to play despite the bnei noach knowing that we have special mitzvos and even status in Hashem’s eyes. It would be really wrong and can’t imagine it giving Hashem any nachas to say the least.
The reason why these song exist is more celebrating the Jewish life and the meaning it gives us (like in the Yiddish one Avraham fried sings.)
Its not bad middos because we only play it at Jewish events and even with the goyim there, we assume they don’t understand Yiddish and Hebrew.(And in the rare exception s/he will understand that they werent meant to understand it so no offense was meant.)
Whereas men and women are one family unit. We are not different societies, like the Essenes were, nor are we meant to be. A Jewish life is family life where men and women share their lives together. As such, a song celebrating shelo asani isha would definitely be in bad taste and middos even though we know and are not offended by the actual Bracha and the fact our men say it.