Joseph, I highly doubt that by goyim today, the guy comes to the girl’s home, sits and talks with her parents, and then takes her out. They probably just arrange to meet at a bar or cafe or whatever.
The differences I think stem from practical reasons.
In E”Y the couple either meets in some lobby or by someone else’s apt- perhaps grandparents or the shadchan, somewhere neutral where nosy siblings and neighbors aren’t around. Most of the boys do not drive (many yeshivas do not let bochurim get licenses) and as shopping mentioned, it is awkward to travel together by public transportation, so the couple travels separately to the meeting place. It is much safer for a girl to travel around by herself at night than in the US- she doesn’t have to worry about being alone on a subway dressed up with jewelry. Also, it would be weird for the guy to come to her place- people live very close together and it would be impossible to keep anything private.
What they miss out on is the parent meeting the boy at the date. To get around this, the father will sometimes arrange a pre-date to meet the boy first (not at home) and the mother will do the same with the girl, or at least arrange to see her at some public event like a chasuna.
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