Up until the last year or two I also had this mentality that everyone should do what they want if regarding simchos, if they can afford it. But then I realized how immoral behavior have seeped into the the secular society just by being exposed to this behavior on a constant basis, and it has been accepted as normal by a vast percentage of Americans. Because that’s how people are, what people are exposed to constantly affects their thought and behavior. This is with everything even with weddings.
Takanos are not a new thing that evolved in the last few years. There were many takanos throughout the centuries, chasunah takanos, burial takanos ( every generation with their meshugassen…) and other simcha takanas. I believe it was the Vilna Gaon, or another big Rav in that time, who who made chasunah takanos.