” I do not think it is fair to tell my daughter, “Listen, sweetie, I know all of your friends and classmates are getting married in beautiful halls with gowns, etc, but we can’t afford it, so your wedding will be in the school gym with regular Shabbos clothing.””
Its nice, shes old enough to get married, shes old enough to be mature about finances. and if not then THAT is where we should work on as a community. Just becasue some meshugenar spent x amount of money on a wedding (that he could or couldnt afford) doesnt mean all of us have to.
You say “Think about this: The cost of a cheap Orthodox Jewish wedding today is at least $20,000. The average annual household income in the United States is just about $60,000. Does this make sense?”
Of course it doesnt make sense. So dont do it