Klug:
You make a valid point. The word “agunah” is being abused, and applied with inaccurate criteria. It never referred to a situation involving divorce. It was only used in Shas and Shulchan Aruch in reference to a wife whose husband is missing, and there is inadequate basis to establish death as a fact. I have grown to tolerate the misuse regarding a get, without forgetting that this is already a step away from truth.
Today, it is used universally to refer to any woman that has not received a get. This ignores the reasons for it. I am well acquainted with many cases where a settlement of the affairs has not been reached, and it is foolish to proceed to the get until this is completed. Ask any dayan. to’en, lawyer, or other askan who has involvement. One would hope that the matters at hand can be resolved easily, but that’s wishful thinking. It is commonplace that divorcing women seek to deny the children from their father. Beis Din may opine on this, but they have no enforcement authority, nor is a Beis Din recognized for these matters by the courts. Men typically seek to get away with minimal payments of child support. Either can demand return of gifts, full ownership of the house, and hosts of other demands. It is not infrequent that one of the parties demands a payoff of a sizable sum of money in order to grant or to agree to receive a get. These hanging issues can create substantial delay. I have heard countless cases where one of the parties responds to the hazmonos to Beis Din, and states that he/she does not want to divorce at all, and wants to engage in treatment to restore shalom bayis. This is a proverbial delay that guarantees nothing happens for quite some time. And when it comes to these issues, men and women are equally to blame. Either way, calling these women agunos is inaccurate, and thrusts the word even farther from its Torah intent. The situation could be pitiful, and either party might be the victim.