Chaim:
I hear you, and recognize that you utter painful truth. I also see comments, which B”H do not reflect a lot of backlash. So you have garnered several who agree with you.
Now the sour grapes. You are correct in noting that the “Moshiach is coming” approach is counter-productive. It removes us from focusing on our tafkid. It sells itself as a defense mechanism to cope with the immense and severe anxiety we have while experiencing this crisis. This is amplified when we watch the tragic deaths around us. Today’s media is reporting the number of pages of obituaries from various newspapers and publications. The mechanism sells itself as a sanctimonious thing, as we are all supposed to be maaminim about the coming of Moshiach. But it diverts our avodah on our own, unique self-improvement. We are too easily sucked into the trap of running around to collect impressions from our Gedolei Yisroel for a reason why the tragedy has befallen us. “It’s all because of talking in shul.” “It’s because of bitul Torah.” “It’s because of inadequate tznius.” Etc. Rav Shteinman ZT”L was not one of those apt to make general statements like this, and would respond that we should do our own cheshbon hanefesh and fix the problems we find.
The kollel system has many advantages. Yet, we are far more prone to encounter the casualties. It is silly to give the responsibility of managing a home to someone with zero means. Our Chazal guided us to have a career path prior to marriage. No, I am not against kollel or learning after the wedding. But we have vilified the one that works, makes an honest living, and is koveya ittim. We have said the vilest things about a bochur that seeks training in a field where parnosoh would be enabled, so that he doesn’t need to spend his life as a dependent. We subjugated the shidduch system to this upside down perception of Torah value, and made the “catch of the day” the “learning boy”. This comes with zero assurance that the “learning boy” is not someone just with the label, and no one knows whether this “catch” will end up in places unbecoming to a real learning boy. And it says nothing at all about the midos that will be brought into the marriage. So it became about money. Should money marry money? Should the rich marry outside of their financial strata? Aren’t we all entitled to spend the early years of marriage with the bills being paid by someone else? You nailed it. Entitlement. A dependent generation.
My sad realization is that we are less than truthful when we declare our lifestyle choice about being a “ben Torah”, or about Yir’as Shomayim. It’s more likely to be a direct result of following the masses that espouse this upside down perception of Ratzon Hashem. It certainly lacks credibility when one reviews the many psukim and Divrei Chazal. But if it sounds holy, it must be the quickest road to heaven. Sorry, but I’ll return to the guidance of our Neviim and Chazal before following these trends and styles. Maybe, just maybe, some of this will be part of the process we develop in our effort to return to normal after COVID.