Reply To: The shidduch process; chassidish & litvish , its working & yet

a couple of points;
the rock- i apologize , i was trying to make a complex subject brief & my comments may have been to cryptic, using some hebrew words & shop talk may have made it difficult to grasp .

RATIONAL- the money question ,is it a maalah? your point is emes & valid yet many bnei torah girls w/o any money are getting married and to learners ( bensonhurst type…) secondly there is a diff in hadracha from gedolim if money is a plus or is it a bad thing. all agree it cost money to live , BH there are many good girls & i am marrying only one so if i have a choice am i better off with one whos family can help or is a girl from a no frills low maintenance type family better off in the long term ( see the nosei kelim in even haezer hanose isha lshem mamon)
lakewhut- all agree not entirely working -the tzaar is great & sometimes when i walk home from tish on friday night i think about all those spending shabbos alone. over shabbos i spoke to 2 shadchanim, both were a little burnt from trying for ” older singles” they felt that the key to getting older singles to commit & say yes was A. a coaching program with a focus on freedom from uncertainty, willingness to leave a comfort zone that there is a leap of faith needed to get married – the kaller family in lakewood has invested some funds lshem mitzva in sucha program . B a speed dating type suggestion so u dont get drained from the process .( the west side has numerous singles who arent getting married w/o the social restrictions of the frum dating scene)