“Are we to expect a frum man to be so fickle as to have no control of where his eyes roam?!”
As a frum woman, you clearly know nothing about men (frum or not).
Also, often you are victimizing yourself by thinking that the complaints are coming by men who feel affected by women’s behavior. We men like to complain about EVERYTHING. Whenever we see something that seems to be an infringement on halacha or hashkafa, we like to make a whole tumult about it. Whether it is being done by women, men, children, politicians, or the government – we always have big טענות and start threads about it, etc.
Next time you see a man complaining about tznius, don’t think it’s a personal attack on you, realize that it’s just another halacha that he feels was violated that he has to shout about.