CTLAWYER,
“The cost of loaning the money at no interest for home purchases was far less than the cost of an apartment in Israel.”
Over the lifetime of a typical mortgage loan, homeowners typically pay out $100,000-$200,000 in interest, and much of the interest is paid early in the life of the loan, which slows building the equity that can be used to sell and “upsize.” For this reason it doesn’t normally make sense to finance a home and then sell it in 5-7 years unless the property value skyrockets. So to provide an interest free loan to your kids to purchase a home is big-league support.
“our children put down 25% down payments that came from their earnings. All paid off the loans within 5-7 years.”
That CTLaw firm must pay quite well. They’re lucky the firm took special notice of them and offered them jobs.
“Why did MRS. CTL and I work so hard for our adult lives if not for our family?”
Kol hakavod! I think what you are doing is absolutely wonderful. I just don’t understand why you’re looking down at other families who are also helping support their children.
“I stayed in my sister’s in Massachusetts 2 nights a week when I was in law school, big deal.”
It is a big deal, and I hope you showed hakaras hatov to your sister.
“MY point is that unless able to earn a living a couple has no business getting married.”
And my point is that that not only is that viewpoint the antithesis of Torah Judaism, it is cruel, because it makes marriage the privilege of the elite. And it surprises me that it’s three Democrats – the party that supposedly cares about the poor – who have chimed in with this position.
“those coming to minyanim to schnor wedding funds, I find it unacceptable.”
Well, the Torah is not based on what you personally find to be unacceptable, or what commonsaychel finds to be humiliating. We have a mitzvah to be misameach a chosson and kallah and to provide for their wedding. In fact, the gemara tells us that those who do so earn reward in this world without decreasing their reward in olam haba. So those “schnorrers” who are coming into your shul are bathing in diamonds, and tossing some on the tables and selling them to you for that wrinkled dollar in your pocket.
I’m a Justice of the Peace, I’d marry them for nothing in my office, enough frum Yidden there to make a minyan and I’ll break out a bottle of scnhaaps and kichel afterwards.
If that will bring the chosson and kallah joy, go for it!
“Weddings are overblown and overpriced.”
\
On this we agree.