The problem is going to be the fact that these people like to drink and they have zero interest in stopping any time soon. It has nothing to do with oneg shabbos or even stress. These are men who choose to act like kids and want to do what they want to do, no matter what embarrassment it may cause. The Rav who gets drunk with them is no better and is doing a diservice to his kahilah for showing poor judgment and being an negative example of how one should act. So I don’t know what more you can do besides start a major rift within and most likly have to find a new bungalow colony. (being that the owner of the colony is a big drinker, you may have little choice)
In the meantime if it really bothers you, skip the kiddush. Maybe get a few other families who share the same feelings and get together and make a mini kidush by your bungalow. Tell your children that life is about choices and that sometimes adults can make poor choices. You can use this as an educational tool as well to your children about the effects of alcohol and how destructive is can be. (I would and have even told my children why people like to drink & while it may feel good at the moment, it takes away from the pleasure of everyone else.)
Being that the Rav actively gets drunk as well, I don’t know how much Rabbonim can do. Speak to your Rav ans ask him what he feels. However, the more we speak openly about this and create positive peer pressure, more and more kehilas will start adapting to a non alcohol style. When looking into bungalows, see if there is a drinking problem. I bet you never even thought about that before, and are stuck being that it’s already mid summer.
On a side note: when one wishes to deal with stress, there are more effective and practacle approaches. When one needs alcohol on a regular basis, that is a clear marker that there is a dependancy problem. The fact that so much is consumed and the need to get drunk is a crisis in itself and needs to be addressed. To say that people are making too big of a deal is A FORM OF DENIAL and rhe problem will only continue to get worse.
Thanks to the author and yeshivah world for taking the time to get this message spoken.