asdf – I think I paid about $60 to have my hair done for MY wedding 🙂
I am so glad I never had to be set up on a date. I never would have done the whole manicure/hair/makeup thing. I’m glad my husband knew what I looked like on a normal day before we even started dating!
Its not just shadchanim who are misguided – its friends and relatives too. For example, two of my family members came over yesterday and a single friend of mine came over to drop something off. He is older (40), MO and a great catch. The two family members asked me afterwards about setting him up with this lovely women in her mid 30s – the problem – she is somewhat yeshivish and at one point wanted a kollel husband!!!!! Now, she doesnt really want that anymore (or maybe has just given up on a man who is 35+, single and still learning) but she is not right at all for a MO guy. Sheesh!! Just because they are both single does NOT mean they should date.
I dont believe in lying or pressuring people either. I set up my cousin with a fantastic guy who was short (5’5). She is 5’2″. She went out with him, but turned him down after the first date because he was short and she just wasnt 100% sure. He really liked her and wanted to go out with her again. I didnt pressure her at all when she told me no, because I believe its her decision to make, not mine.
My friend was set up with someone and the shadchan totally lied to the guy about her. He told her she was in graduate school (still in undergrad), lied about her age etc…it worked out in the end (they are happily married with 2 kids), but if that were me I would be livid. It should be MY decision to set parameters on who I date, NOT YOURS. I know this story ended happy but it really bothers me that people think lying is ok. Its not.