Mrs. shindy:
I am treading on eggshells here, and I am not claiming to understand your pain.
I only hope that we can learn from our joint past experiences so that we can have the outcomes we would like to have in the future.
The example which I brought is a real example (with the admonisher (a teacher) using the actual English word, which the Mod would rightfully delete). It has turned this person off from the love of Judaism, even though she/he goes through most of the motions (for various reasons). I can only hope it will be corrected over time.
That is why I shared this. Others should not make the same mistake, and if they see someone else doing this they should try to vacciniate the receiver from the effects.
I would hope others could do the same, so that I can learn what not to do. It is so hard to raise a child these days, I would hate to not have all tools possible.