Sjs,
1) I don’t think that the Chofetz Chaim meant to say that you are need to go around telling the whole world what a Rasha she is, he simply means that one should DENIGRATE those who DO avaoros befarhesya & not the people who recognize that that is what should be done.
2) Not sure what you mean.
3) Again, not 100% sure what you mean, but it sounds like we may be in agreement.
4) Probably true, but my point is, don’t bash the people who recognize that we don’t have to stick up for those who do avairos.
5) No problem.
6) As I already pointed out, those who cheat on taxes are definitly getting box seats in gihennom. I am NOT sticking up for them. I’m just saying that that is an aveira b’tzina about which the Chofetz Chaim does NOT say that one may speak Lashon Hara about them. (There are numerous reasons for that) As opposed to someone who does avairos b’farhesya.
Granted, their hipocrisy is despicible & unjustifiable & could cause people to go off the derech.
See, once again we CAN reach some common ground. 🙂
Tzippi,
The Chofetz Chaim himself points out that oftentimes tochacha is couterproductive in which case it should not be done.
In the case of Sjs, all the conditions have been met. (Being informed by the aveira doer of his repeated misdeeds is as good as witnessing it). Also when there is a “kol d’lo passuk” i.e. the persons aveiros are done publicly & everyone knows about it, it is permitted to believe it.
I always tell my childrem in the langauge you describe, i.e. “nebach, you see them driving on shabbos, they must not know that it’s assur, oy, how sad”.
Howevever it must be CLEAR to oneself & one’s family that such behavior is UNACCEPTABLE.
Additionaly, once your kids are older, they sometimes know that it’s not “nebach they don’t know”, it’s just “nebach they don’t care”.
Finding excuses for & rationalizing the behavior of people who flaunt the authority of Torah & Rabbanim is WRONG & BAD CHINUCH for oneself & one’s family.
I hope this clears the air.