oh my favorite topic… 😉
Honestly, you cant totally blame the shadchunim b/c they deal with so many ppl and have lives besides being shadchunim. That is why either you, your parent, or someone who is there looking out for your shidduchim, should pleasantly but assertively be on the shadchun’s case. Call Up and remind them to work on things. update them. ASk them is new things came up or if they have new ppl for you to meet. I am a BIG talker cuz don’t ask… but l’maase this is what they say works.
Also, if you make yourself sound like a nebuch, they will think you are one, if you clearly show them you are not, they will clearly not think you are (except a few exceptions… and boo on them)