Reply To: Shadchanim

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SJSinNYC – I think a 2 week time frame should be advocated for the normal shiduch. Most people after a couple of dates will either reject or get serious enough to contemplate that after 2-3 more dates they may be able to get engaged. The scenario is the same whether you have a date every 2-3 days or whether you meet every 1-2 weeks. What I am saying is that this method shoud be encouraged both by parents and shadchonim – OBVIOUSLY if one side feels they need the extra time they should not be pressured at all, they should be able to take as long as they need.

Come on we need to get the systme moving – why should someone go out with 1 boy/girl over a 3months period when they could go out with 4-5, especially in busier periods such as bein hazemanim.

Don’t forget – in every shiduch you eventually have to take a small leap and put your trust in the one above – no one can be 100% CERTAIN that they will be happy for the rest of their life on day one.