Tzippi, I agree with you all the way.
Kamayim Panim El Panim Kein Lev Hadam L’adam. If you create an atmosphere of giving and of I am there for you, the feeling will be mutual.
As far as support goes, obviously, there is no right or wrong, and there is no way to set a standard. Some have money and some dont!! (Isn’t that profound!) I dont even see what the arguement is…
As far as a girl being mature, AHHH you hit a raw nerve, I think this is very imp. point. In fact, I have a relative ( who has a lg. family by now) and got engaged in the beg of sem, she tells me she is happily married but she admits that the beg was very very hard bec she was so immature.