and if it takes moving out of town or going to a kollel that’s not the boy’s first choice, then consider that your mesiras nefesh! the girl has to support and have the children and take care of the house and relocate to somewhere that the boy chooses and maybe even commute to work and/or school??? why cant the boy at least do his little bit of hishtadlus of pitching in and be willing to learn somewhere outside lakewood where he can get help from a kollel?? why is the boy’s learning so delicate that he can only learn in one place?
and again, is image coming into play? are the boys so worried what people will think of them that they can’t go out of town? what happened to having a little backbone? and doing what’s right and not what’s accepted???