” boys usually say yes to a FEW girls at the same time (obviously ones who pass “inspection”). “
Whose inspection, exactly???? I believe it is the boys’ MOTHERS who are inspecting to death. I have a son who is not yet married. I don’t “inspect” his shidduchim. The only things I am interested in prior to a FIRST date, are the following: Is she a sweet, kind, balabatish girl? Are her parents and siblings warm and caring people with a hashkafa close to our own? If those two criteria are met, there is plenty of time after a first date, to determine if further information will be necessary. That’s how I see it, and it has never steered me wrong yet. I am not interested in hearing about tablecloths, dress sizes, gorgeous or not, “best girl in Yeshivah,” or not. Twenty years from now, it will matter very little if my daughter-in-law was an Aleph plus student.What WILL matter will be whether or not her middos, along with those of my son, were imparted properly to their children. After having children, many girls will have gained weight over the years. Looks are very subjective. What a parent thinks is attractive often is not, to the son or daughter.
It’s time to stop being concerned with external naarishkeit, and start being realistic about what really matters for our children’s future.