boredjewishguy:
“If the shaddchan is helpful and spends a lot of time working for me, I would feel obligated to pay something even if the shidduch didn’t go through.”
Correct!! and yet less than 1% of our community practices that. This is what is so hurtful to shadchanim.
(if it was a easy cinch of a shidduch the shadchanim are generally more than happy with the numbers you mentioned above- of course)